Mental health is becoming a topic that is less taboo and more open, which is a great thing. Too many people give up when the light is just around the next corner of what can seem like a never ending dark tunnel. Personally, I’ve had my fair share of tragedy and loss in my short life and even battled my own demons and depression. Needless to say, I came out the other end and looking back I can’t believe I was just about ready to give it all up. Life is painted in bright vibrant colours today, and back then it was all dark greys and black. Depression is a disease that does not discriminate. But just because it can’t be seen and many people don’t understand it, does not make it any less lethal or devastating to the people affected. My own experience saw me shut my bedroom door and not emerge for about 3 or 4 months. I refused to leave the house and spent every waking moment curled up in bed – going from feelings of emptiness to all out despair. It wasn’t pretty. Healing was a slow and painful process too, but that’s another story. I […]
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Have you ever sat one of those dreaded personality tests? You know the kind, there’s no “right answer” but everything kinda seems a little like a trick to make you look like a asshole. I had to sit one as a part of the interview process for a job I’d applied for, it was full of bizarre yet straight forward questions, and I couldn’t quite tell what the preferred answer as meant to be. One of the questions asked if I was a perfectionist and I guess to anyone on the outside looking in I don’t look like much of a perfectionist. I’m certainly not immaculately turned out, I’ve been known to have messy hair and chipped nail polish, I don’t excel at everything I do, but then again… …perhaps I am a perfectionist. Later in a second interview for the job, the interviewer referred to this question. “Can you give me an example when being a perfectionist is a negative thing, or has negative effects“was he onto me? Confused I initially struggled to answer the question. My interviewer prompted me, “would striving for perfection halt your progress“. Initially I thought no way, don’t be ridiculous… but then again is […]
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Let’s imagine that your mind is a giant store, the kind with multiple departments and all kinds of merchandise from practical and essential right through to the luxurious and high end. Since this store is your mind, you’re the only customer. Oh, and you also have a pretty generous shopping budget! All the merchandise in the store symbolize your thoughts, emotions, memories, urges, etc.—everything that goes on in your mind is right here on the shelves and in the aisles of this department store. Some of the merchandise you really like, some you don’t. Some of it seems really important to you, and other items are trivial. Some products are useful, or fun, or trendy, or straight up unhealthy. Just like in real life, you probably have positive or negative judgments about lots of the items in the store, and others you just feel neutral about. As a customer of this store, you don’t really have direct control over what merchandise the store stocks, but you have control over what you buy, what you invest in, and what you go into debt for! Your purchases will probably influence the store’s future inventory. For example, if you buy lots and lots […]
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Achieving can be as simple as believing … and giving it a good solid crack. Think of the things in your life that you’ve not tried for fear of failing, now imagine if you’d believed you could and you did! Imagine all those things achieved. It’s been said if you start the day as you mean to continue, and set yourself for achieving things right from the get-go, crossing things off your to do list will flow easily throughout the day. Apparently something as simple as making your bed each day can put you in “achievement mode“. Quick Tips for Achieving Goals and Smashing Your To-Do List: 1. Break your goals into smaller bite-sized chunks: Goals are often abandoned because they are too big and too vague and eventually feel unachievable and overwhemling, break your goal down into smaller tasks that you easily cross off bits at time. 2. Commit time daily: You don’t have to commit hours and hours each day towards accomplishing your goal, but you do have to focus. You’ll make great strides long term with smaller, regular calculated efforts. 3. Paint yourself into a corner: Accountability is a great motivator. Tell others your plan and they’ll […]
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Everyone has their triggers and warning signs, you know… the things that indicate a need to reset and recharge. For me the first warning sign is always sleep… or lack of. From lack of sleep it all seems to crumble down around me, from lack of sleep stems more lack of sleep and then too much sleep. It took me years to realise that lack of sleep was my personal warning sign. Every now and then I neglect my healthy sleep habits, but it doesn’t take me long to realise that I need to get back to basics. Generally going to sleep isn’t my problem, staying asleep is. I can wake around 3-4am (or sometimes earlier) and then lie awake until it’s time to get up. I can lie awake tossing and turning, and once awake, my mind starts firing on all cylinders, thoughts fly round and round and sleep seems further and further away. Researchers refer to the variety of habits around establishing a good sleep habit as “sleep hygiene” … and good sleep hygiene is becoming more and more important in this 24/7 environment we live in. Up & at ’em – Try and go to bed […]
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While there are parts of winter I love… electric blankets, winter clothes and winter food, but I’m not really not that fond of what makes actually winter. It’s the cold, I’m more of a hot house flower as my Nana would say, I’m not lover of cool temperatures and I most definitely suffer from the Winter Blues. The Winter Blues are actually a thing. As the days get shorter and nights get colder some of us tend to suffer from low energy, mild depression and the desire to hibernate until the warmer temperatures return. Severe Winter Blues is also actually a thing, a very real thing, known technically as Seasonal Affect Disorder (S.A.D), which for sufferers obviousyly occurs every year at the same time… winter. The exact cause of S.A.D isn’t really known, but many people believe the seasonally depression is linked to reduced exposure to sunlight, as sunlight can affect some of the brain’s chemicals and hormones. Lack of sunlight is thought to affect the production of mood hormones melatonin and serotonin. Serotonin is a feel good brain chemical and low levels have been linked to mood, stress, anxiety and poor sleeping patterns because serotonin can also be converted into melatonin […]
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Perusing the internet and social media in search of positive inspiration can often uncover clap-trap and empty words, but I’ve stumbled across The Happiness Experiment – 3 Good Things . The Happiness Project (T.H.E) is great largely because of it’s simplicity and sense of community… and it was started by a KIWI! ”
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It’s true, nothing changes if nothing actually changes. Often we get so caught up in complaining about an issue or situation, that we forget we can do something about it.
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Sometimes you’d almost rather sit in silence than make mindless small talk. Sometimes you just crave a proper, meaningful conversation, you want something with a little more depth and a tad more meaning. Sometimes you just want to know a little bit more about people. and want them to know a little more about you. There are times when you require a little more from your interpersonal connections than Instagram or Facebook can provide. Enter Kalina Silverman, an American Research Scholar reinventing small talk and transforming it into BIG TALK. I was first introduced to Kalina’s “Big Talk‘ concept in one of those inevitable small talk situations… a group outing. Not just any group outing, an outing full of people I didn’t know. Midst all the small talk and bog standard get-to-know-you chit chat, one of my new acquaintances dropped a bombshell … she’d come armed with great conversation starters and was willing to use them … “If you knew you were going to die on Monday, what would you do tomorrow” a far better conversation than where do you work and a much more interesting way to learn about someone. She’d discovered BIG Talk while watching Ted Talks on YouTube, and had taken […]
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After the brilliant Store Metaphor I’ve struggled to find something to top it. There are so many inspiring things out there, but for me The Store Metaphor made so much sense, topping it was feeling impossible. I wanted to find out more about happiness, and where other people think happiness steams from, so where else do you turn to for profound answers and brilliant video content…. TED of course! And that’s where I stumbled across David. David Steindl-Rast is a Catholic- Benedictine Monk, born in between World War One and World War Two in Vienna in 1926. After receiving his MA from the Vienna Academy of Fine Arts and a PhD from the University of Vienna, David emigrated to the United States in 1953, where he joined Mount Saviour Monastery. After twelve years of monastic training and studies in philosophy and theology, Brother David was chosen to participate in Buddhist-Christian dialogue, and co-founded the Center for Spiritual Studies with Jewish, Buddhist, Hindu and Sufi teachers. So it’s fair to say that this man is attuned with spiritually from more than just a catholic perspective, in 1975, Brother David was awarded the Martin Buber Award for his achievements in building bridges between […]
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