The path to awesomeness is dotted with many rocks, pebbles and the occasional bolder.
Last week I had to go back to the doctor for a repeat prescription, unfortunately for me my normal Doc is apparently on holiday until March! So I instead saw Dr Smith, a woman wearing brown roman sandals, khaki cargo pants and a large Sydney tourist t-shirt. Explaining to someone else my issues and problems is hard enough when I’ve already established a bond with another doctor but it’s made all the more difficult when the person you’re talking to isn’t listening and is instead Googling Restless Legs (the other reason I was at there).
Dr. Smith also gave me a “mental health quiz” which made me feel almost like I was lying on a couch explaining ink blots to a highly distracted Psychiatrist.
Do you often think of committing suicide?
Do you think about harming yourself or others?
Do feel like a disappointment?
Do you have trouble getting to sleep?
Do you sleep too much?
Do you have no appetite?
Do you over eat?
Do you feel like you’ve let everybody down?
Do you have no motivation?
I answered the questions, even though they were oddly depressing and a bit of a bummer, handed Dr. Smith back the quiz and eagerly awaited some kind of feedback. I guess I’d imagined much like a teenager girls quiz determining which Backstreet Boy I should date, that there would be some quick tallying of scores and an answered revealed. But no.
She just took the bit of paper, and put it to one side on her desk. Had any of my answers to this quiz been cause for alarm, she wouldn’t know… she didn’t even read it! I now regret not giving her ink bolt answers instead.
Quiz: Do you have trouble getting to sleep?
My answer: In this ink blot I see the high school bully, and the time she filled my drink bottle with toilet water.
Although perhaps messing with mental health quizzes is a dumb idea, there are probably some things in life you shouldn’t screw with. If I was feeling fine before hand, I certainly wasn’t afterwards, this quiz just created more questions…. What if I am a disappointment? What if I have let people down? Feeling disillusioned and suddenly somewhat of a head case I continued onto work. I felt let down that someone who seemed to have no interest in people had become a doctor. I felt like another number just going through the door…. I certainly felt thankfully that she was not my regular doctor, and eventually mine would return.
I didn’t want to go to work in funk, I suddenly wanted to run home and hide. I wanted to run home, curl up on the couch and watch Doctor Phil. However, that’s not an option; I can’t simply opt out of work or life because I’m feeling a little out of sorts. So I did my In Car Rock Star Therapy, which is both fun for me and entertaining for other motorists. I found my current song of choice Happy by Pharrell Williams, turned it up as far as I could, pushed the feared (by other passengers not me) Repeat Song button and ROCKED OUT! I sung and bopped along the entire way to work and by time arrived I could laugh about Doctor Smith and her Mental Health Quiz, or as my co-worker called “Which Disney Princess Are You”
I’m glad I didn’t let one awkward woman with roman sandals ruin my day, and I glad I could laugh about with my work family…
Next time I’ll make sure I don’t see Doctor Smith.