Mild adventurer. Prolific daydreamer. Always authentic.
Mental Health

What you allow, is what will continue.

Firstly I must apologise for the lack of posts lately, I didn’t want to post something ranty and needed to wait till I had a clear head in order to write.

It’s been on my mind a lot lately….

What you allow

Clearly we shouldn’t tolerate greater social issHow many of us (and yes I’m included) see things happen and do nothing? How many of us acknowledge that something is terrible and leave it at that? We often tolerate another person’s bad behaviour. We often tolerate aspects of our life that we don’t enjoy. We stay in job we don’t like, working hours we don’t like and simply complain about it rather than taking the steps to make a change.

We often allow things to happen, and not-so-happily live with things the way they are, rather than taking the necessary steps to change things.

What upsets me most is when we acknowledge bullying, unfair treatment of someone, those that have less than us and yet we do nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I’m not suggesting we all turn into freedom fighters, or sell all of our possessions in order to give to others but what surprises me is the things we think we need.

Doing nothing

Clearly there are greater social issues which we shouldn’t tolerate:

  • We shouldn’t tolerate the neglect  or abuse of a child.
  • We shouldn’t tolerate a lack of respect for our family members.
  • We shouldn’t tolerate hate towards another person because of their religion, race, sex or any other factor.
  • We shouldn’t tolerate bullying. Nobody has the right to make another person feel shit.
  • We shouldn’t tolerate injustice.
  • We shouldn’t tolerate anybody disrespecting the elderly.
  • We shouldn’t tolerate poverty

But today I’m not just talking tolerance and change from a social sense but a personal sense. I’m guilty of tolerating an unhealthy lifestyle. I’m guilty of tolerating a job I no longer enjoyed. I’m guilty of not standing up for others and not voicing my concerns. I’m guilty of complaining about the state of things… then doing NOTHING about it.

Nine things you should stop tolerating:

Being Unhealthy. If you’ve acknowledged that you’re unhealthy and should change… why don’t you? Don’t allow previous failings in terms of diet and fitness dictate your future behaviours. Don’t tolerate it, bothers you, change it.

Inaction. Often in life people get stuck in situations and environments through fear, guilt, or simply not knowing in which direction to head next. In order to achieve and progress we often have to “bite the bullet” and take a step in any direction.

You shouldn’t tolerate being in an unhappy relationship because of guilt. You shouldn’t stay in a job that you don’t enjoy through fear of starting something new. New things are exciting. Change is good.

Take smaller steps, start with smaller decisions,  if your ultimate goal seems far to big, break down the goal until you can say with “Of course, that’s so easy I can do that… no problem”

Negativity. Negativity is like the common cold, it’s catchy. Don’t tolerate other people’s negative attitudes, and don’t tolerate your own. If you, or someone else is having a particularly negative  moment or conversation acknowledge it as being negative and move on…

Disorganisation. Don’t let disorganisation act as a barrier to achieving. Saying over and over “I don’t have time to…” isn’t going to always cut it. Get more organised by creating schedules and habits which help give you the time to do the things you want to. Imagine looking back in years to coming realising that do missed out of things simply because you weren’t organised enough.

Chronic stress. It seems more and more people nowadays live with high levels of anxiety, stress and fatigue. There’s almost that constant feeling of things being out of control. There’s no one answer for moving past this, it comes down to a combination of realising what’s important doing what’s best for you and becoming organised… what needs to be done now verse what can be done later. 

Coveting Thy Neighbours Goods. It’s natural to want what others have, it’s natural to compare and measure ourselves against others too. We  measure our success in life based on what others around us are achieving and milestones they’ve hit. It pays to remember though, that happiness doesn’t steam from possessions and we can’t measure ourselves against others because we never truly have full insight into what’s happening in someone’s life. 

Outward appearances can be deceiving.

Things won’t actually make you happy.

Thinking that perfect exists. Stop beating yourself up, perfect doesn’t exist and you shouldn’t be upset with yourself for being human. Instead of focusing perfection, which is unachievable, simply do the best you possibly can and call it a day. Focus on your achievements rather than perfection.

Everyone’s opinion of you. I’ve wasted so much time and energy over the years worry about other people and their opinions of me. “Was I wearing the right thing“… “did I say the right thing“… “do they think that was the right to do

The moment I started letting go of focusing on other peoples opinions was moment I started to feel more like myself. Focusing on others think about you is time consuming and draining.

A job that you hate. If you work a 40 hour week you spend more awake at work (I would hope) than you do anywhere else. Imagine spending so much of your waking life in a job you hate.

Always examine what you tolerate and allow to happen, because what you allow is exactly what will continue.

Peace out.